Cursing

by The Castaway Poet

I just love cursing.

Cursing is my hobby,

my pass time,

my daily mode of relaxation.

I love it.

Cursing is my medium

and my muse.

It's how I express myself.

I love cursing.

Unfortunately, I can't curse all the time-

like at my job,

around my children,

around my mother.

I even like replacement curse words

which come in handy

if you have some serious cursing to do,

but it may be construed as inappropriate.

I can work in replacement words as easily

as I can with the genuine article.

Oh snap!

What the frick did you think I was going to say?

Shut the front door!

Oh sugar!

Aw, fudge!

These words can help ease stress,

they may just not be as impressive

as the real deal.

(Or as fun to say,

If you want to be truly honest

with yourself.)

And since they aren't as shocking

or impressive, sometimes you have

to just shout obscenities

so loud that your neighbors think

you're watching Maury

with the bleeps removed.

I love cursing.

Some would say that if you have to resort

to curse words,

you sound uneducated with nothing better

to say.

I say

sometimes it's easier to express myself

or get my point across

with an oh so handy curse word.

Usually, when you curse,

no one misunderstands

or misinterprets

what you are saying.

It's pretty hard to think someone

is having a good day

when they are muttering

"Oh, shit! Oh, shit!"

as they walk

down the street.

You just get out of their way

and leave them be

because you can hear

that they have problems.

Some people frown when others

curse around them,

but I'm sure that they are cursing

deep down inside

where no one can hear them,

"Please, just shut  your damn mouth!

There are children present."

I love cursing.

I learned to curse at my grandfather's knee.

He was a wizened,

toughened,

blue collar farmer.

He would cuss up a storm

at anyone

or anything

that screwed up

or crossed his path.

To me, he was a great guy,

and if the penalty for cursing

was a mouthful of soap,

that was a consequence I was willing to accept.

(Grandpa used lava-

now that was cuss-worthy experience!)

My mother would shudder in horror

whenever I repeated

any of my grandpa's choice phrases.

What mother wants to hear

her seven year old

call the family cat

a sonovabitch?

I love cursing.

In fact, studies now show that cursing

can be beneficial to your health.

Say what?

Cursing can be so good for you?

Take that all of you who are too

easily offended!

Mwah-ha-ha!

We cursers will take over!

But seriously,

If you are hurt

or get hurt

cursing helps

alleviate

and abbreviate

the pain!

If you curse, you are able to

withstand more pain

than if you don't!

If you curse,

your pain goes away

faster

than

if

you

didn't

curse

at

all!

So, what's the big fucking deal?

I love cursing.

I string curse words together

and it's a

fucking art.

Cursing to me is like

Leonardo Da Vinci to oil paints.

Someday, I will create my

Starry Night through a string of curse words

the world has never seen.

So get off my back when I am

stringing expletives together.

I may be sculpting my David,

my Mona Lisa,

my Venus De Milo,

my masterpiece

out of words.

I love cursing,

so

back the fuck off

and leave me the FUCK alone.